Ladies and gentlemen I am bored. I have got absolutely nothing to do . and I am undergoing the I-am –suddenly-good –for-nothing syndrome. I am stuck at home with nothing other than my comp, my kitten, loadsa gud food, a comfortable bean bag and a P G Wodehouse for company. The fact that I am a peace loving animal who gets homesick every other day prompted me not to opt for a project. Don’t you ever mention iit roorkee to me. but now I am in a fix. Every single dude I know is doing a project/ training. It somehow doesn’t make sense to me go do something just to put it on my resume because I know I am a technically challenged person naah technically impaired would be a better word. I somehow don’t like the fact that I am doing engineering. I can’t find any emotions or beauty in any of the subjects I learn. Btw I am one of the most emotional persons you can ever find. This is supposed to imply that I cry after every other movie, that a good book can sent me into spells of silence for real long time, that I can’t put up with heart string tugging events in a relationship. I wish I had taken up journalism or even law. So much of emotions. So many stories that deserve the light. That reminds me I was ever hardly ever good at anything. Smiling and goofing around in school made sure that teachers never said a bad word about you during the parent teacher meetings. So all my life my parents believed I was a good kid. And I believed it too. With less of efforts and more of luck I managed to get into NITW. I still wonder why I am there. Juniors, neighbours look up to you with sense of awe when they hear NITW. I don’t get it. Someone more deserving should have been there. Getting back to parents, being the eldest in the family my parents tell my sis “look at azeera and learn. She did us proud”. Ya so my parents like everybody else expects me to get a great job. Settle down and have two kids probably. Can’t blame them for it. Ya I need a nice paying job and ask them to retire and chumma sit at home. How long will they keep slogging so that you can go have shawarmas every other day. Sometimes I just want to rip the world apart and do something different. To change things that makes the world so cruel. My sis who loves animals puts it right, “ the world would have been so good if the cats and dogs roamed around like humans at least they don’t kill each other chumma.” I don’t get it either why should people kill each other just because they got two roads to reach god. Why two ppl who love each other shouldn’t marry just because they are from a different religion, forget religion even different sub castes why should people to starve to death when I get to eat shawarmas every other day? . Sometimes you wonder is god blind. Why does he let so much of hungama happen in his name? but then WHAT is the difference I want to bring about is million dollar question. The word difference kills me too. Every tom dick and harry talks about making one. How many of us actually bother to bring it about.
I would love to quit it all and do a course on journalism and write what I please. But then pragmatism stops me. the world would call me nuts. My parents wouldn’t be so proud. My juniors wouldn’t look up anymore. But then what is this life if you live for what others think and not what you do. I still don’t know why I am writing this. I had a level headed conversation with mom the other day. She had an alternative option for journalism and emotions and people’s stories. Civil Services. She is right. But the question is do I have it in me to work so hard. I still don’t know where I am headed.. I always went where life took me, I dream big but never put in that extra effort to change the course. Silicon jungle, the movie, puts it beautifully “pakiya is born. Pakiya did well in school. Pakiya got into IIT. Pakiya got a management job. Pakiya earned. Pakiya spent. Pakiya died.” But azeera my dear, wants to be different naah take the offbeat road
PS: This post is not for anybody to read. My blog. My frustration .My space. I write what I please.
Saturday, May 26, 2007
Monday, May 14, 2007
when Aphrodite got it all wrong
The Hyderabad times quiz “How Romantic Are You?”
Please mark the option closest to your answer
1. Your idea of a perfect dinner date
A. candle light dinner at restaurant
B. dinner cooked by you with love and some wine
C. pan pizza at your favorite pizza hut outlet
2. The perfect gift
A. flowers
B. perfume
C. music cd
3. The perfect “I miss you” signal
A. missed call
B. make a call, tell him/ her how much you miss him
C. sms
4. The perfect holiday
A. hills
B. beach
C. amusement park
5. Your turn ons
A. candlelight
B. public display of affection
C. thunderstorms
Maximum As: you epitomize everything romantic
Maximum Bs: romantic however desperate too
Maximum Cs: you need help.
Heights of joblessness coupled with frustration prompted me to take the above quiz on a Thursday evening. To know the cause of my frustration readers kindly refer footnote1. Some quiz to determine how good I was at the art of falling in love. The results were equally disappointing I scored maximum Cs. Aphrodite did a poor job. I NEED HELP.
But wait I can explain myself and my choice of answers.
1. (C) pan pizza at my favourite pizza hut.
I just don’t get it. How can u sit with a guy in candlelight dude! You can’t see him properly, forget that what about lack of visibility of food. Someone remember I wear glasses. Now food cooked with love by me. That for sure would be my last date. It would definitely have loads of love and yeah loads of salt too. Pan pizza at pizza hut is the best idea babe, I love their balloons and never dying enthu of the place. I would have loved to choose (D) dinner at nanking. Nothing can beat the pleasure of staring at busy roads and cute guys who pass by ;). Someone, guess it was William Henry Davies, said it right, “What is this life if full of care, We have no time to stand and stare”
2 (C) music cd
Flowers wither away. They don’t last beyond a week my dear. And about perfume, you never get the right one, waise I do take my bath .Music CDs!!! Anytime. The re-writable ones preferably
3 (C) sms
I hate missed calls. Which dictionary in the world says missed calls= I miss you. It could very well mean, “I am bugged so let me bug you”. Ringing up. Impossible I hardly ever have the balance. SMS is the way to use your mobile especially considering the fact that airtel charges me a meager 25 paisa for a national sms. No, you don’t have to show me your teeth. I aint lending you my phone.
4 (C) the amusement park
Undoubtedly the best place for some fun, thrills and entertainment. I wouldn’t mind the other two options either. I chumma love holidaying ra!!
5 (C) thunderstorms
Candlelight!!!! Not again, told you once right. I wear glasses. PDA!!! Why should someone kissing somebody else turn me on?. I would rather have my bf give me a French one. Thunderstorms. Now that is something exciting. Hey Times, do I have an option for sarcasm or a decent sense of humour!!
I am disappointed. Pragmatic, sensible, simple ( and I am modest too!!) everything I that thought I was is suddenly replaced with “I NEED HELP”!!!!
I am single. I am bothered.
1. with friends back home asking, “What!! You are still single!!!” [ okay, I dint know it was a crime]. “ Az you have to find a guy yourself. You never can trust arranged marriages to work”
2. With a certain senior of mine popularly known by the name of a flightless bird asking me every now and then “mole, you still not married!!”. Refer footnote2 for the reason of the statement. [For the ignorant, mole is not a rodent; neither does it translate to spy. Mole means daughter in Malayalam. ]
3. I stand tall at five feet and a little less than half an inch. Finding a guy with compatible height is an impossible task. I am told to look at 8th grade kids!!!
4. With my 80 something granma reminding me and my mom every now and then, “pothu pole valuthaayi annittum oru adukala paniyum ariyilla, kurachu naal kazhiyumbol ketichu veedanulathaa”. The statement in quotes literarily translates to, “you have grown as big as a guy buffalo and you still don’t know to do anything in the kitchen, you have to get married in some time”. I dint know buffaloes knew how to cook. Waise, she should have called me an eruma right . [ for the non malli, eruma= girl buffalo, pothu= guy buffalo]
5. Topping all the above reasons. I aint romantic. I need help!!
A little of thinking over and yeah I am back to the sensible me again. I aint romantic. Big deal!!. I am still single. Bigger deal!!. But I am independent. Yippee!! I got the freedom to look at any cute, tall dark/ fair handsome guy. [Readers kindly note I am strictly against apartheid.]. I don’t have to be bothered about finding a guy, running around a tree with him and then go through the painful process of telling my parents why all of a sudden he means more to me than they who brought me up all my life. I am a free bird. Yahoo!!! [Not the internet services company. I meant yahoo as in yippee]
Foot note1: I have my engineering graphics lab on Thursday. No matter how well I do my chart the prof manages to give me 5 on 10, and tell me, “you will get a C grade. you are an ammai!! You are supposed to draw neat”. Someone please talk about gender equality. Btw ammai doesn’t mean mom. It is the telugu word for girl and yeah profs don’t lie. I did get a C
Footnote2: Muslim malayali girls especially if you have your roots in the Malabar region get married very early. I should have had two kids by now.
PS1:with due respect, I don’t belong to the age of the meanderthal man. I can’t afford to deviate in my posts. Hence the footnotes :D
PS2: thankfully I don’t remember the rest of the questions of the quiz
Disclaimer: this is not as an advertisement towards my “I am single” status.
Please mark the option closest to your answer
1. Your idea of a perfect dinner date
A. candle light dinner at restaurant
B. dinner cooked by you with love and some wine
C. pan pizza at your favorite pizza hut outlet
2. The perfect gift
A. flowers
B. perfume
C. music cd
3. The perfect “I miss you” signal
A. missed call
B. make a call, tell him/ her how much you miss him
C. sms
4. The perfect holiday
A. hills
B. beach
C. amusement park
5. Your turn ons
A. candlelight
B. public display of affection
C. thunderstorms
Maximum As: you epitomize everything romantic
Maximum Bs: romantic however desperate too
Maximum Cs: you need help.
Heights of joblessness coupled with frustration prompted me to take the above quiz on a Thursday evening. To know the cause of my frustration readers kindly refer footnote1. Some quiz to determine how good I was at the art of falling in love. The results were equally disappointing I scored maximum Cs. Aphrodite did a poor job. I NEED HELP.
But wait I can explain myself and my choice of answers.
1. (C) pan pizza at my favourite pizza hut.
I just don’t get it. How can u sit with a guy in candlelight dude! You can’t see him properly, forget that what about lack of visibility of food. Someone remember I wear glasses. Now food cooked with love by me. That for sure would be my last date. It would definitely have loads of love and yeah loads of salt too. Pan pizza at pizza hut is the best idea babe, I love their balloons and never dying enthu of the place. I would have loved to choose (D) dinner at nanking. Nothing can beat the pleasure of staring at busy roads and cute guys who pass by ;). Someone, guess it was William Henry Davies, said it right, “What is this life if full of care, We have no time to stand and stare”
2 (C) music cd
Flowers wither away. They don’t last beyond a week my dear. And about perfume, you never get the right one, waise I do take my bath .Music CDs!!! Anytime. The re-writable ones preferably
3 (C) sms
I hate missed calls. Which dictionary in the world says missed calls= I miss you. It could very well mean, “I am bugged so let me bug you”. Ringing up. Impossible I hardly ever have the balance. SMS is the way to use your mobile especially considering the fact that airtel charges me a meager 25 paisa for a national sms. No, you don’t have to show me your teeth. I aint lending you my phone.
4 (C) the amusement park
Undoubtedly the best place for some fun, thrills and entertainment. I wouldn’t mind the other two options either. I chumma love holidaying ra!!
5 (C) thunderstorms
Candlelight!!!! Not again, told you once right. I wear glasses. PDA!!! Why should someone kissing somebody else turn me on?. I would rather have my bf give me a French one. Thunderstorms. Now that is something exciting. Hey Times, do I have an option for sarcasm or a decent sense of humour!!
I am disappointed. Pragmatic, sensible, simple ( and I am modest too!!) everything I that thought I was is suddenly replaced with “I NEED HELP”!!!!
I am single. I am bothered.
1. with friends back home asking, “What!! You are still single!!!” [ okay, I dint know it was a crime]. “ Az you have to find a guy yourself. You never can trust arranged marriages to work”
2. With a certain senior of mine popularly known by the name of a flightless bird asking me every now and then “mole, you still not married!!”. Refer footnote2 for the reason of the statement. [For the ignorant, mole is not a rodent; neither does it translate to spy. Mole means daughter in Malayalam. ]
3. I stand tall at five feet and a little less than half an inch. Finding a guy with compatible height is an impossible task. I am told to look at 8th grade kids!!!
4. With my 80 something granma reminding me and my mom every now and then, “pothu pole valuthaayi annittum oru adukala paniyum ariyilla, kurachu naal kazhiyumbol ketichu veedanulathaa”. The statement in quotes literarily translates to, “you have grown as big as a guy buffalo and you still don’t know to do anything in the kitchen, you have to get married in some time”. I dint know buffaloes knew how to cook. Waise, she should have called me an eruma right . [ for the non malli, eruma= girl buffalo, pothu= guy buffalo]
5. Topping all the above reasons. I aint romantic. I need help!!
A little of thinking over and yeah I am back to the sensible me again. I aint romantic. Big deal!!. I am still single. Bigger deal!!. But I am independent. Yippee!! I got the freedom to look at any cute, tall dark/ fair handsome guy. [Readers kindly note I am strictly against apartheid.]. I don’t have to be bothered about finding a guy, running around a tree with him and then go through the painful process of telling my parents why all of a sudden he means more to me than they who brought me up all my life. I am a free bird. Yahoo!!! [Not the internet services company. I meant yahoo as in yippee]
Foot note1: I have my engineering graphics lab on Thursday. No matter how well I do my chart the prof manages to give me 5 on 10, and tell me, “you will get a C grade. you are an ammai!! You are supposed to draw neat”. Someone please talk about gender equality. Btw ammai doesn’t mean mom. It is the telugu word for girl and yeah profs don’t lie. I did get a C
Footnote2: Muslim malayali girls especially if you have your roots in the Malabar region get married very early. I should have had two kids by now.
PS1:with due respect, I don’t belong to the age of the meanderthal man. I can’t afford to deviate in my posts. Hence the footnotes :D
PS2: thankfully I don’t remember the rest of the questions of the quiz
Disclaimer: this is not as an advertisement towards my “I am single” status.
Friday, May 11, 2007
i am an INDIAN too
1.The police verification for my passport.
Police man: “what’s your name?”
Me: “Azeera Aromal Azeez”
Police man: “Muslim?”
Me : “yes”
Policeman gives me a look that says, “You look like a hamas suicide bomber”.
Policeman : “what’s your father’s name?”
Me : “Assankhan Abdul Azeez”
Policeman: “what??”
Me: “Assankhan Abdul Azeez”
I get yet another look that says, “Sounds like Osama bin laden.”
Policeman: “which state?”
Me: “kerala”
The Policeman pastes my photo, takes my thumb impression and lets me go.
I am seriously starting to doubt if I look like Mullah Omar’s daughter.
2. My cousin in Delhi is planning to change her son’s school. Her reason: her 7 year old is teased in school coz his dad carries a mullah beard.
I love inzamam ul haq. But I love the Indian cricket team too. I am a Muslim, a non burkha wearing one. But I am an Indian too.
Police man: “what’s your name?”
Me: “Azeera Aromal Azeez”
Police man: “Muslim?”
Me : “yes”
Policeman gives me a look that says, “You look like a hamas suicide bomber”.
Policeman : “what’s your father’s name?”
Me : “Assankhan Abdul Azeez”
Policeman: “what??”
Me: “Assankhan Abdul Azeez”
I get yet another look that says, “Sounds like Osama bin laden.”
Policeman: “which state?”
Me: “kerala”
The Policeman pastes my photo, takes my thumb impression and lets me go.
I am seriously starting to doubt if I look like Mullah Omar’s daughter.
2. My cousin in Delhi is planning to change her son’s school. Her reason: her 7 year old is teased in school coz his dad carries a mullah beard.
I love inzamam ul haq. But I love the Indian cricket team too. I am a Muslim, a non burkha wearing one. But I am an Indian too.
Wednesday, May 02, 2007
My supermen-2
people the world deserve to know..................
My cousin got married two years ago to a “nice, “homely”, loving” woman who takes great care of her husband and in-laws. I never attended the wedding as it was one day before my kerala CET exams. An officer with the police department he was always the less favorite, not so easily approachable cousin who neither took me out nor bought me chocolates. The two above mentioned reasons coupled with a total I-am-not-interested attitude towards family gossip made sure that I remained ignorant regarding the bride’s whereabouts. It was lately that I got to know that this new member of our family came from real poor living conditions. A fatherless girl, her siblings include a Down syndrome affected brother and three younger sisters. It was not a love marriage. He chose to give her a life coz “ I am an enforcer of the law, I deserve no right to accept dowry and violate it. Waise this way I will for sure be there in God’s good books.” During a recent family get together, the older worldly wise gentle men advised him, “Its time you start saving. Keep an eye on the future and make wise investments”. My cousin replied, “ I don’t mean any offense but at the moment I have to make sure that three young girls get married.” Today this cousin of mine is a proud father of a sweet little baby girl and my biggest awe inspiring figure. Ikka, you rock.
Thought3: I believe in angels. Something good in everything I see.
My cousin got married two years ago to a “nice, “homely”, loving” woman who takes great care of her husband and in-laws. I never attended the wedding as it was one day before my kerala CET exams. An officer with the police department he was always the less favorite, not so easily approachable cousin who neither took me out nor bought me chocolates. The two above mentioned reasons coupled with a total I-am-not-interested attitude towards family gossip made sure that I remained ignorant regarding the bride’s whereabouts. It was lately that I got to know that this new member of our family came from real poor living conditions. A fatherless girl, her siblings include a Down syndrome affected brother and three younger sisters. It was not a love marriage. He chose to give her a life coz “ I am an enforcer of the law, I deserve no right to accept dowry and violate it. Waise this way I will for sure be there in God’s good books.” During a recent family get together, the older worldly wise gentle men advised him, “Its time you start saving. Keep an eye on the future and make wise investments”. My cousin replied, “ I don’t mean any offense but at the moment I have to make sure that three young girls get married.” Today this cousin of mine is a proud father of a sweet little baby girl and my biggest awe inspiring figure. Ikka, you rock.
Thought3: I believe in angels. Something good in everything I see.
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